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From Playpen to Zen > Post Natal Depression - My Top Five Tips for Sufferers
By Michelle Anderson
October 15, 2010

image courtesy of healingdream

Having suffered from post natal depression (PND) with each of my three children I feel as though I have some worthwhile experiences to draw upon which might help others currently facing this illness – gee, there has to be something positive to come from it all!!

So here are my tips for sufferers of PND.

1.    Ask for help

If you’re like me you don’t like to ask for help. I know I have an unrealistic expectation of myself – that I should be able to cope with anything and everything. But, you know, we’re all human and as such we all have times in our lives when we simply can’t cope alone with what life has thrown our way. Now please notice I did say we can’t cope alone – we can cope though – we just need to put our hand up and tell someone that we need a bit of assistance.

2.    Accept help

From partners, parents, siblings, friends, neighbours, doctors, psychologists, baby health practitioners, telephone counselling services etc etc etc. People do want to help others who are struggling or suffering – it’s part of what makes us human. And when you take a minute to think about it logically (and not through the emotional haze of PND) when you’re well yourself you like to help people – don’t you? So right now is your time to accept the help that others offer you.

3.    Accept that PND is an illness

For some people (like me) this one can be a toughie! Psychological illness still has stigma attached to it. Part of the stigma relates to the (totally inaccurate) viewpoint that PND sufferers are just feeling sorry for themselves and that they should ‘pull up their socks’ and just get on with things. Don’t for a minute accept this viewpoint. PND is an illness just like diabetes is an illness. You have not brought this on yourself. So say goodbye to any guilt and concentrate instead on the things that will, in the long run, help you to get better.

4.    Be kind to yourself

My first bout of PND occurred over 18 years ago but I still remember being told at the time by a baby health social worker to be kind to myself. That was a strange concept to me back then – I remember thinking, ‘Why be kind to myself when I have failed so miserably as a mother?’ And of course that kind of thinking (generated and perpetuated by the PND) was a big part of the problem. But the concept did stay with me and gradually I accepted the wisdom behind that simple statement. It was a massive turning point for me and can be for you too!

5.    Be patient – you will recover

Another hard one but also true. If you take one day at a time (or even an hour at a time) and nurture yourself you will gradually start to see some light in your life again. Of course when you’re in the pit of depression it’s hard to believe that. But do try and notice even a temporary shift in your emotions – and that’s all it will be initially – you might notice yourself smiling (a strange sensation after months of depression) or you might look at your baby and finally feel a little glimmer of the overwhelming sense of love you expected you would always and automatically feel as a mother. Grab and hold onto those fleeting emotions as your lifeline – trust me, there will be more and more of them in the future.

Contributing writer, Michelle Anderson, now has 3 main focal points in her life: her family, her well-being and her online gift service – www.pamperboxes.com.au.

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